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To get over limerence, it’s helpful to refer to the original research. Tennov found that limerence usually ends in one of three ways: consummation, starvation, or transference. In consummation, the person experiencing limerence discovers the object of their desire has reciprocal feelings and they engage in a physical or romantic relationship. In starvation, the person experiencing limerence does not find reciprocity and experiences a great feeling of loss, which overtakes the intensity of the attraction. And, in transference, the person experiencing limerence simply transfers their desire to someone new. Of course, you can also take matters into your own hands. “Limerence is a product of your own neurochemistry—while the other person is the trigger, the feeling originates within you, which means you have the power to change it,” says Banarsë, who recommends focusing on yourself, your work, your interests, and your other social connections instead of on the object of your affection. “You must actively disrupt the behaviors that reinforce the obsession. Stop seeking signs of reciprocation, end the idealization by consciously reminding yourself they’re an ordinary person with flaws, and interrupt the fantasy cycles.”Yes Im Old But I Saw Penguins Greatness Thank You For The Memories Premium Shirt
You can also just come clean and tell the object of your affection how you feel. If they reciprocate, amazing. And if not? “Sometimes a clear rejection provides the closure needed to move forward,” Banarsë says.
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