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Samantha has been Roxy’s family’s healer for years, providing palm readings via hour-long phone call sessions and pixelated images of tarot cards. While I am not religious, astrology has been an attractive alternative; as an Aquarius Sun, Scorpio Moon, and Leo Rising, I appreciate self-reflection, personal insights, and enjoy rationalizing my emotions with Olympian precision. I also wanted to try something new. So I sent a blue-turned-green text to Samantha to see when she was next available. Days passed without a reply from Samantha, and I debated sending a desperate follow-up message. Then, before I had to beg, Samantha sent me a date, time, and smiley face emoji to confirm our session. On the day of my first reading with Samantha, she was about four hours late to our scheduled phone call. When I tried calling her, it went to automated voicemail. With some late-materializing plans to go out with friends, I decided the stars were not aligned for me, at least for tonight, and hopped in my friend’s car. Mid-way through appetizers and cocktails, I saw Samantha’s name pop up on my phone.Buffalo Bills Playoffs Are For The Mafia Shirt
Within the span of five minutes, Samantha had skipped pleasantries and knew all about my three Italian mothers (my mother and her sisters), my current complicated situationship, and my dreams of becoming a writer. I was so taken aback by the accuracy that I ran to the bathroom and sat with a cocktail napkin and pen on my knee, writing every word she said. Four years later, I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve scheduled sessions with Samantha. Do I think Samantha is legit? Yes. She’s eccentric, gracious in her delivery, and talking with her feels more productive than a typical therapy session. If I had to guess, I’ve called her about five to six times a year for about $125 per session, which comes close to over $3,000. I’ve also sent her number to several of my close friends, who’ve also enjoyed speaking with her and gaining insight into the relationship dynamics within their own lives. I cannot say I completely cringe at the price tag, even though, as a freelancer who for most of her early adult life has lived off of scholarships, I am making a financial choice some might mock or warn against.
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